I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize