You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
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I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
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My day in three words: secret purse cake
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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