so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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