So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
