He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.