Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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