what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
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I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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