Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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