Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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