did you get engaged???
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
