please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
