Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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