It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
