no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
