I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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