K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i wish my penis had a tongue
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
