I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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