I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
