do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
