You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
