What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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