hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
