Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
tell me about the fingering
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
