I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize