oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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