If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
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He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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