I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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