why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
