I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Randomize