if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize