I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
