Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
