so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize