i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Randomize