And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
