my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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