Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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