What a fucking waste of an outfit
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
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I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
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Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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