I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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