when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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