Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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