I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
