Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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