just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
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