Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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