Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
