Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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