Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
