yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Randomize
