If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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